1. |
The Rain
03:09
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I didn't know what the rain meant
A bad omen for sure
I said we're your entertainment
And that this one goes out for our hope for an encore
And meet me when I hit the bottom
Where our potential stands forgotten
And in the distance, cross the water
Redemption
The words were paper and cardboard
And they meant nothing at all
But this is what we've worked hard for
So they've no right to call me a liar
They wave us over, discuss in their dulcimer tones
All of the dreamers we'll convince are not alone
We like your style, too many teeth in their smiles
And so the bounty of our youth is turned to fuel for the dial,
And the rain
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2. |
Perfect/Gone
03:54
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You think you're so far above me
Well I don't think you know yourself I think that you love me
You're losing all your traction and I won't hit the breaks
I'm gonna hold to this collision course whatever it takes
And though we probably won't last
Well that won't stop me from denying it and burning the past
Cause though our future's looking darker every day
Well when's the future ever brighter anyway?
You've made your case
And I can't face
The way your ego feeds
This lie it cracks and bleeds
Like a heart in some teenage prose
But every time you smile you outweigh the lows
You're baffling my instincts to distrust the good
You rattle my composure like I never would have thought you could
And now my heart is breaking
The greatest dream is over and I find I'm waking
And against all available evidence
It wasn't cause I lacked self confidence
Yeah it was you and it was me
It was my penchant for avoiding it and your tendency
To let your anger linger simmering
And I can't say if I've learned anything
You drain me dry
My eyes too cracked to cry
And now the strings come in
And let act three begin
The unraveling, our final decline
Where we both admit that you are yours and I'm only mine
We thought ourselves so clever so above the game
But no matter how unique a love it always ends the same
So long I thought you were perfect, so I danced 'round rationality to say you were worth it
So long that we never knew, and while our threads became more twisted our distance only grew
So long farewell and goodbye, I could maybe live without you but I can't live a lie
So long but don't say it now, we could just sit here reminiscing close our eyes and both remember how
We were meant for the spotlight, were meant for the stage
And how we tipped our scales to happiness from fear, guilt, and rage
You lifted me completely, you broke down my guard,
And though the hope you left won't leave me well it makes the leaving hard
You slew every demon you vanquished my past
You scoured every nightmare with a moment to last
And although looking back I only notice the lights
That's the sadism of memory, the only place this ever was right
And every time I look at you I see someone new
You wouldn't have believed what my own hopes did to you
But nothing's ever better than the moment it ends
So I'm happy that you happened though I know we'll never be friends
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3. |
From Our Heights
06:11
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Shells burn the walls
Soot stains the sky
Blame rests with me
I won’t let you cry
Give me a smile
Hold me once more
I’m broken and spent
Not worth fighting for
This carcass of steel
Shelters our end
Eyes closed we can float
Time to pretend
Shot down from our heights
To ancestral home
Grip tight till it hurts
You won’t pass alone
And all that I no longer believe
Is a signal to me
Of the thousand miles traveled, the thousand miles left to go
And all that I no longer recall
Doesn’t mean much at all
We’ve stripped life of all but dying, it was hard enough to get through once
We never thought
We’d shoulder this
Narratives rot
Nothing remiss
We brush the sun
Spiral to ground
Lend me your voice
I can’t make a sound
You hold me close
Whisper goodnight
This shell’s a ghost
You are my life
And everything we can’t recreate
We will approximate
We will stitch up a tomorrow if it leaves us to the last undone
And for our anger the future will be bleed
But I’ve got, what I need
It’s amazing how stupid, amazing how strong we can be
Let them record our every mistake
We’ll not waver nor break
We will hold ourselves with dignity, will rise above with effortless grace
Let the rising sun mark our return
Let each verdict I’ve spurned
Lend its weight to my conviction when I swear I’ll get you out of this place
Let love and anger alone set us free
Let what you mean to me
Be enough to grant us providence, enough to see us both carried home
Don’t let your demons compel you to care
Past our seven foot square
If there’s any fight left in you I am begging you to hold on to life
We aim so high
We’ve no restraint
In blood we try
To wash the taint
We’re chained to our
Nuclear dove
But all I want
Is you my love
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4. |
Suburbicide
02:48
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Three kids and the house
Two dogs and a mouse
I got my book group on the weekends and a husband slash louse
Ten grand in reserve
Just what we deserve
Cause here in nowhere we all spend exactly what we’ve earned
Big color TV
Channels infinity
Having too much quality television’s such a pity
Think about the day
Then wash it away
Start getting drunk enough to think the things I’m too drunk to say
We’re gonna be fine
We’re gonna be fine
I’ll contemplate if this is what I wanted down the line
We’re gonna be fine
We’re gonna be fine
Or better yet I’ll just forget so honey pass me the wine
Soccer practice at five
The domesticity jive
I may be feeling catatonic but I’m fully alive
Make it back to the door
Dog vomit on the floor
Yeah this is what I leave the liquor cabinet unlocked for
Goes straight to voicemail
His voice running stale
And then my message is the thunder just preceding the hail
He’s at the motel
She won’t kiss and tell
But I still love him and everything else is going swell
Set fire to the car
Then storm in the bar
And he can stumble out the back but he will not get far
I catch him at last
He’s crumbling fast
Cause when the truth erupts he knows we’ll both be caught in the blast
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5. |
Four Days Early
06:24
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Said I'd spare six days in town
Can't say I'd hoped that you'd be around
Sugarless coffee, I can recall
Six days until the fall
Can't tell who I've missed the most
You as the girl, the memory or ghost
Love's been elusive, fleeting and thing
That's me; how've you been?
I think I love you more this moment than I ever did then
I would do anything to have you, to be sixteen again
If I could scream across the ages I would shake myself, I'd get it together
The past is only getting brighter as the future extends
Just give me one more endless summer before everything ends
If I could cut myself out there I'd be content with my lot, for forever
And I know you're nothing worth dying over
Cause you're just empty memories, empty fears
And nothing worthwhile ever, lasts forever
At least that's how I justify these years
But yeah it brings me to tears
I must learn to hold my tongue
Cause I'm not all that young
And I'm not all that dumb
Well maybe I am that dumb
Let me walk you to the car
Hey, remember the old bar?
Well it sounds like you've got quite a day
Well then, see you around anyway
Now I know everything ends
But the polishing of absent friends
It seems the best things never last
Because they're only the best in the past
And now you're daring to send me condolences
As if you've got something useful to lend
You think poise demonstrates your maturity
Higher ground's all you've the strength to defend
And now your silence steals my revery, my past is all you'll ever be, to say I've not loved you all along, I don't know who is more wrong
I'm gonna crystallize this moment and then tear it apart
Not gonna let all your revisions hurt your place in my heart
Memories aloft will only leave me so I welcome your smile to the killing jar
You led me closer to the water but you're letting me down
I hope you know my palace crumbles with you stumbling around
So if the only thing you say to me is 'weren't we a time?' that's fine... I agree
And yeah I know that it's my fault, in the end
We grind the best of regrets from the best of friends
So I regret the day I trusted you to never turn your back on me I've hidden myself inside your eyes you fake you frail phylactery
And as I walk these streets they all seem shabbier
I don't know who I'm supposed to blame
And neither they nor you seem worth the barrier
So in the end I've nothing to my name... you know that? You know that?
You know what?
That sounds just fine
I'll take the seven ten train, and I'll head for the city
Gonna leave your life, it never was mine to tell
Gonna shake these streets, leaving four days early
I'm leaving this empty well
So let my longings only lie with what's in store, let my past be sealed behind these boarded doors
Let my memories fade and all my trophies burn, let me learn forgiveness or at least to yearn
Let these worthless grudges all be cast aside, let my baseless ego fade to honest pride
Let the roof cave in, let the walls fall down, let's emerge from the dust to the sun
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6. |
Spent
08:26
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There’s no way we’re gonna end this
With the proper degree of accord
There’s no way we might get through this
Yeah somebody’s going to get hurt
There’s no way we’ll overcome this
We’re all just struggling to live
There’s no way we might regain this
Something is coming yeah something is going to give
Why won’t you
Believe me
Why can’t you see that I’m telling the truth?
On my knees
Entreat thee
Held up to see our diminishing youth
Give me one
Last chance to
Just understand ‘fore the meaning is lost
What we had
Amounts to
Let’s just move on and regretting the cost
Don’t make me do this
Though we decay every day there’s no reason for this
We’re gonna get through this
Though we’re scaling the gallows one day we’ll be drowning in bliss
Please don’t believe this
So I missed every signal you know I can be hit or miss
We’re gonna retrieve this
You may say that you hate me you still hold my heart in your fist
There’s no way we’re gonna save this
Not while holding our grudges so close
There’s no way we’re gonna brave this
Not while loving each other but loving our anger the most
There’s no way we could conceive this
When we first joined in hands and in love
There’s no way they would believe this
In the words we’ve both spat and the standards fallen so short of
Don’t make me say this
I still love you fiercely but love will not cover the gap
Don’t make me delay this
And saying you need time to think is the worst kind of crap
Cause we’ve both survived this
And emerged from the river both rancid and covered in blood
And we can still drive this
Away from the thunder before we’re all lost to the flood
When I turned from grasping at straws in the dust
I beheld all your beauty and words turned to rust
I could just barely conjure the courage to speak
But our seventeen words ran through my head for weeks
And when we would collide I could hear in your voice
All my dreams and my fears, an answer and a choice
But I never quite seemed to get all the words right
And what seemed clear beside you would fade in the light
So I hid all my doubts in a dark tangled mass
And would steel myself daily to make it all last
But the lies in my eyes and my trembling tone
Seemed to already say we’re already alone
So we clashed and we busted ourselves in our heat
Each remark a riposte each rejoice a retreat
And when we finally cast aside all of our fears
What remained stood a tower of anger and tears
So we’re through, because of you, because of me and all that I believed, and yes we’re done, says everyone, they knew we were finished ‘fore it was conceived, living in the past, we know it won’t last, sustainability is not on our minds, cause between our fights, we both burn most bright, our passion has woven itself in our binds, and we are both
Blinded by our light… it tides us through the night… and who knows wrong from right… anymore
I’d cede the point
Fights without end
It just got harder to pretend
You must have known
That our accord
Only emerged when I got bored
Takes every ounce
Of poise and grace
To not spit all it in your face
And now at last
We can agree
That no agreement’s bought for free
And if we can’t rise to the beauty befitting our station
We shall fall with such terrific violence as we’ve never known
And if this won’t end in laughter and reconciliation
It’ll see us both squabbling over the one remaining throne
And we won’t call it wrong but we know it’s not right and we’re both of us tired and torn from the fight but we still stand and squabble and bicker and bite and redemption it flickers and falls out of sight because
There’s no way we’re gonna end this
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